Are you having a problem getting a man you want to ask you out? Well I have some tips to solve your issue. Many times I get asked by women how to make themselves more approachable. Some men may think that a woman should already know how to do that. Believe it or not many still struggle with it. They tend to overlook the simple things that can give a man a hint or the confidence to ask her out. That man can be just as nervous or more nervous than you are. So here a 3 things you can do to show him you’re interested.
1. Smile
This has got to be the simplest thing a woman can do yet so many neglect this effective tool. I am not saying walk around everywhere with a big grin on your face. What I am saying is that when you see a guy you like you should highly consider breaking out that winning smile. That will instantly give him notice that you may have some interest. It was also create a more pleasant environment for him to feel comfortable enough to approach you. Looking at him like he stole something will do nothing to increase your chances of exchanging numbers. Side Note: some of you may go with the “sexy” look instead but the risk is some men can’t tell the difference between the “sexy” look and the “what the hell are you looking at” look
2. Give a Compliment
Ladies you are not the only ones that like to receive a compliment. We men enjoy it as well especially when it comes from a woman we may be interested in. The other reason why a compliment can really help in showing interest is the fact that a lot of women do not do it. So when it does happen it immediately catches the man’s attention (most men). Some women have become immune to compliments due to the frequency in which some of you receive it. Though I would argue that even those women still want compliments from the man they love from time to time. Men typically aren’t used to it and is it a great way to say “I am interested. So don’t be punk! and ask me out already” : )
3. Engage in conversation
I remember once approaching a woman and trying to make conversation. She didn’t seem very much into it. I assumed she was not interested and went about my business. Later when I spoke to a female friend she told me the woman actually was very interested, but she is just like that in regards to having a conversation. Well how the hell do you expect me or any man to know you have interest if you are not making an effort to carry on the conversation. I understand that some men will overlook this and still try to get your number. For the guy that you actually like you are making it harder for him to realize you want him to ask you out if you are not saying much. Not to mention that you may simply lose his interest because you are coming off as possibly being boring and not having much of a personality. If you don’t want a man to proceed then continue with the vibe of just waiting for him to shut up and walk away. Just know how to not let that happen when it is a guy you actually want to have future conversations with.
For some of you ladies this list may be common knowledge and what you already practice in your lives. For others this may simply serve as a refresher for information you are already aware of. Then there are some who just flat out overlook how these simple acts can do wonders in increasing your chances of having the guy you want approach you and ask you out. Men already have all the pressure of having to typically initiate things and attempt to read a woman to see if he should proceed or not. The least you could do is make that process easier for him which is a benefit to the both of you at the end of the day.
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54 thoughts on “3 Ways to Show Him You’re Interested”
Love this! I have to say I do indeed flash my smile……and kill men with the smile/dimple combo!!!! Lol…It works a majority of the time! Thank you for the wisdom!
thanks Tra : ). Good to hear that you are already implementing some of the things mentioned in the post. keep it up.
What is your email address? I cant find it! And it wont post from here. You have GREAT articles and stories. Keep them up!
My email is contact@stephanl.com and thank you very much : )
I agree with all you put down my brother im glad im not the only man feeling the same way. i used to be shy and it was because of these reasons, and its even harder because im in the marine corps so ladies what this man is speaking is nothing but truth.
thank you Tariq, I appreciate that. Yeah some women don’t realize how their inability to do some of these little things makes it harder for a guy to approach them
This is wonderful advice! I think a lot of women make this harder than it has to be. I know I did. (Smile) I would love to share this post on my blog if that is okay. I look forward to reading more from you. Your friend from Black Bloggers Connect – Candra.
thank you Candra : ). yes many women do make it much harder than necessary. you most definitely can share this post on your blog. also send me your blogs url when you get a chance
What if smiling or putting on fake ass “charming airs” to get a man is not your personality or style? What if you’re a real ass girl who takes time to warm up to people like most sane people should. Then what are you supposed to do? Put on airs to do the things u listed?
If you don’t want to do any of these things that is your choice. Just understand that you don’t make it easier for men to approach you when you don’t give off a positive vibe, and do something that shows you may be interested. It doesn’t mean a man won’t ever approach, but you could increase your chances if you do some of the things on this list. I’m not sure why you think that not smiling or talking makes someone “real” but I understand that this is your perception. I also don’t understand why you imply that a friendly person is not “sane”. Again these are just tips that I believe most men would agree could help in catching their attention. It is up to you if you want to implement them or not.
If it’s a hardship to offer someone a genuine smile, or sincere compliment- then you’ve got bigger issues to deal with than boys/ men. I’d recommend doing some self-help or therapy… there might be some walls that are guarding your heart keeping you from warming up to folks. If you can’t open up, then it might not be a good season for dating.
How will you know when the guy is interested in you if you’ve done all these things
If he is interested then most like he will make a comment or just flat out get right to it. If not, chances are he doesn’t feel the same way. To be 100% sure though you would have to just be honest and say something.
Hello I appreciate this post, but I have did all of this I am in college and I really like this guy I am a sophomore now and he is a junior, I have wanted him since my freshman year. I have went out of my way to hang out , have conversations with him, and I even try to stroke his ego from time to time by telling him I know he will be sucessful and so on. I dont know maybe he does not like me the way that I like him or he is still not sure. Either way I am ready to just say “When you gonna quit playing and come on and be my boyfriend” But I would not do that cause I dont want to look foolish but how much more can a girl do gosh!! please respond at your earliest and let me know is there more I can do? or is he just not that into me?
Honestly Ebony, either he isn’t in to you like that or he isn’t prepared to go that route with you at the moment. Whichever it is I think it would do you some good to address this question with him. You are worried about looking foolish, but the longer you don’t address it the more it will continue to haunt you and drive you crazy. Just be honest and see what he says. If he isn’t interested you will finally be able to move past this, if he is then who knows what can happen next : )
What if you have done all of the about, and he doesn’t notice you in that way because you 2 are dear dear friends
Well though you may not like hearing this, there is a good chance that he just isn’t interested. The only way to know for sure is to put it out there. Of course understand that can change the dynamic of the relationship but you will at least get this off your chest and have an official answer.
Ooooh! Thats why men think I’m interested. I’m always smiling to be friendly, I compliment sometimes to break the odd awkward feeling thats there, so that I wont feel out of place. I start a conversation with those that are around me so that I wont start one with God.. ppl may think Im really crazy.lmbo…OMG! I have to read the ways to show them that your NOT interested..lol:-)~smile~
Thank you for proving that it works lol too bad that isn’t what you were aiming for in most of your encounters with men.
The Smile 🙂 It works!
You need to have a topic called real recognize real to speak on when a guy is being real about himself and his feelings
I will work on that but in the meantime I did an article previously that pretty much talks about that issue -> https://www.stephanspeaks.com/loves-show/
Done, done, aaaand done… with very little luck. I consider myself an attractive, level-minded, down to earth female, but struggle to meet someone who isn’t a player, a bum, or younger… I look younger than I am, I take care of myself, I work hard which may come off as being career-driven (what else should a single woman be driven about?)… what’s next? help!
PS – I’m kinda old-school too so I prefer a man who leads and does take initiative….
Send me an email if you would like to discuss this further advice@stephanspeaks.com
PERFECTO!!!
Personally, I have a small problem with that because I’m always alone when I am out, and it seems that most guys are intimidated, or just be stuck in a daze. They’ll look, smile but wont converse. I don’t mind making small subtle gestures, but I really hate having to initiate the matter of getting to know one another better, it just makes me feel like I’m going to have to do everything else in the relationship, if there is to be one, but I already know, I am not going to put up with it very long.
Well if you come off as intimidating then that is even more reason why you should show some kind of interest. You don’t have to chase the man down or do all the work. Just simply give him something to work with which lets him know you are available and interested. After that it’s up to him to take care of the rest.
Stephan what is perceived as intimidating? I like Vickiey tend to go out alone, but notice that men don’t approach me. This is something I’ve wondered about for awhile.
Totally spot on. Thanks for sharing a man's perspective! Always valuable.
when i really like a guy, i am anxious and shy around him.. i dont seem to get myself smile, talk to him, compliment him… I cant seem to lighten up. I am afraid of rejection and disapproval, i am afraid of his opinion of me… I know at 28 i should be better…
i want to give thanks to the great doctor Lawrence who help me in getting back my ex-boyfriend i saw a testimony post by miss Kate from Spain about how the great doctor Lawrence had helped her, i decide to email him and to my greatest surprise my ex-boyfriend came back to me after three days of contacting him.i simply want to say thanks for what he had done for me and am so happy may he live long. if you have any problem just email him :drlawrencespelltemple@hotmail.com and you will not regret contacting him…
Love this!
This is so funny because I find myself asking the same question….I went on a date with a man a couple of months ago that swore I made "such a great impression" on him, yet has not asked me out again. He says that I am "too hard to read". What exactly does that mean? I mean all we do is text back and forth and have never actually had an actual phone conversation. Its not like he is going out of his way to show me he wants to continue going out. He SAYS he does, but his actions feel so differently. Just seems like such a hassle…
Well before I comment let me say that this is my opinion from my experience. What happened to men pursuing a women? I don't know if its b/c there are more women than men &men have so many women to choose from but what happened to the thrill of the hunt? Ok, I may not be smiling and giving compliments in the moment that you meet me but dont assume that I will always be that way. Also, the media has our men so messed up thinking that they have to look a certain way and do certain things &.they overlook so many good women
Those three pieces of advice are right on, sir… There is NOTHING more unattractive in my opinion than a harsh, edgy or unapproachable woman. I’ve learned over twenty years with my own husband that a soft place, a soft word, a kind touch or gentle smile is a priceless thing to offer a man- and often one they won’t turn down! A man doesn’t need to know you’re strong.. they need to know you’re there for THEM, steel wrapped in velvet is always a good thing…
Great point! Smile more! I tend to be way more serious looking than necessary. I'll be more of my surroundings and smile at a brother in teh future. Great post!
my problem is always get the friends status or the go to girl when they have relationship probems…
I just met a really nice man on a dating service. He said that my smile was what attracted him to me. When out, I try to keep the conversation on the man's level asking him questions about him. I also allow him to ask me questions about myself when he wants. If the whole conversation ends up about him, I know to walk away and don't look back.
Hope he reads it 😉 So he knows how to behave…
great post. i find nowadays it’s sometimes difficult to see when a woman is interested
Problem is friend zone to girlfriend
Wow… you sound good so far ? is can you get a man for me?
Lesson 1: Don’t be a bitch!
This is so true because men are different depending on the places you are used to. At home, they did not care, they would start a conversation with you if they were interested because it was so common. I moved to another state and it was like no interaction almost. I was trying to think of ways to become more approachable and I am definitely going to try these. It just seems like when I push these things, it never works out. Like I jinx it or something.
I've smiled,complimented and tried to engage in a conversation but that ended in arguments, bcuz I pointed out what he does wrong after he said that he'd stop Ima being blamed for everything even the things he's done wrong. He's gotten a second Facebook page, me and my family are blocked from seeing it but he has nothing to hide but every female that was on his first page is now on his second page which is supposed to be for family. He hates me and wants a divorce but won't divorce me.
There are spiritual Daughter that seem to always talk about wanting God to send them a husband; yet want to maintain integrity and respect, while at the same time wanting to cultivate a relationship! Very valuable insight for some! Could you take a few moments out of your busy schedule and inbox me with a few pointers coming from a male perspective that I as a female Pastor who gender inclusive could share with the flock! I am a Pastor males/females! The Clear and Blameless Word Ministries.org or my facebook please contact me via phone also! (512) 269-7508! Pastor Trinita D. Sarpy! Peace! Thank You! In his Service!
Interesting
Thx..great reminders
My daughter has a question. What happens if none of these three things work. Say you smile at him constantly And compliment him on a regular basis and have multiple conversations with him. And he still Hasnt made a move. Does that mean that he is just not interested or does he not comprehend the signs?
Smiling comes just as easily as conversing, I do shy away from giving compliments though.
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Tks for the tip!